I could tell as soon as he walked in the door that he was upset. The pressure of middle school sure can get to him. Im sure the 65 that showed up on the meter didn't help how he was handling himself either.
I tell him to grab a snack out of the closet and his book bag; we need to leave for tutor. He listens with a somewhat frustrated "tone", and we walk out the door.
On the way, I take the opportunity to find out what's eating him. He says he "just couldn't think today". He couldn't think of a hook to write about in language arts. Other people had really good hooks, but he just couldn't think of one.
This means he got nothing done.
Now I know what your thinking... Really, he's upset over that?!?! Keep in mind that Justin is a perfectionist, he takes medication that slows his thinking and he's been running low today. Please cut him a little slack.
I talk to Justin about how the hook doesn't have to be perfect, I talk about how getting upset makes thinking harder. I give him almost the same talk I do every time he gets frustrated. But this time he caught me off guard... He asked me if I could get him someone to talk to. "Like a therapist".
What?
Don't get me wrong, I am all for getting help, it's even something I've talked about doing, but for my 11 year old son to ASK for it. That kind of hurts.
Justin tends to bottle things up, kinda like him momma, I hope finding him someone to talk to will give him the release he needs or the answer he's looking for.
I tell him to grab a snack out of the closet and his book bag; we need to leave for tutor. He listens with a somewhat frustrated "tone", and we walk out the door.
On the way, I take the opportunity to find out what's eating him. He says he "just couldn't think today". He couldn't think of a hook to write about in language arts. Other people had really good hooks, but he just couldn't think of one.
This means he got nothing done.
Now I know what your thinking... Really, he's upset over that?!?! Keep in mind that Justin is a perfectionist, he takes medication that slows his thinking and he's been running low today. Please cut him a little slack.
I talk to Justin about how the hook doesn't have to be perfect, I talk about how getting upset makes thinking harder. I give him almost the same talk I do every time he gets frustrated. But this time he caught me off guard... He asked me if I could get him someone to talk to. "Like a therapist".
What?
Don't get me wrong, I am all for getting help, it's even something I've talked about doing, but for my 11 year old son to ASK for it. That kind of hurts.
Justin tends to bottle things up, kinda like him momma, I hope finding him someone to talk to will give him the release he needs or the answer he's looking for.
13 comments:
Aw Lora! I felt that one in my heart, as I'm sure you did. But you have to give him props for asking for someone to talk to. THAT is huge! Hugs to you both!
He's an awesome kid. Like his momma. :). Don't ever forget that!
ahhhh sweet boy :o( I hope that he is able to let it all out and talk to someone soon. Big hugs to you and I agree with Hallie...he is awesome just like his Momma!
As a counselor, him as a teenager asking for support in this is truly amazing. I too hope you are able to find a good fit for him...if I can help in anyway let me know. xoxo
wow...it's awesome that he has the knowledge and the courage to ask for that kind of help...but it's heart wrenching at the same time!
sometimes we just need to talk through things with a 'stranger' to help us figure it out...hope he finds what he is looking for!
HUGS!
What a sweetheart. I love that he knows what he needs and can ask for it.
Oh honey. HUGS!! But I have to say, the fact that your sweet boy is ASKING for help, and knows what kind of help he wants, is nothing short of amazing. He is so in tune with himself that he WANTS to help himself! That is fantastic. I know it is so hard...our daughter (non-d) sees a therapist for other reasons, but I value the fact that she has someone to talk to.
You rock. :)
I think it shows maturity and self-awareness far beyond his years... Good for him. Elise does play therapy and it does so much good for her. Hope you can find someone that he can connect with.
What a beautiful boy. So sensitive, and frustrated right now. Ethan, my oldest, at almost 7 years of age is starting to see a therapist for similar reasons. She nicely explained that many bright children bottle up their emotions and rather than dealing with one emotion at a time they hold them all in then get overwhelmed and self internalize everything until they implode. Sounds all too familiar in our house. I hope you find a great place for him ((HUGS))
<3
Glad he asked for it, but I get ya...off guard for sure.
(((HUGS))) sweet Lora.
Oh, what a sweet boy! That really is awesome that he knows to ask for help and had the courage to speak up and tell you that. I hope you find someone he can really connect with and feel comfortable talking with.
Aw. I'm sorry to hear he's struggling in this way, but holy cow, that seems so amazingly mature of him to identify a possible solution such as talking with someone! What an amazing guy!
My son sees a children's therapist so he can talk about strategies to deal with frustration, depression and anger. Originally I was concerned just with regards to being T1, but he can talk about whatever is bugging him. We've seen some progress.
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